Me and the old man
So I nipped upto my mam n dad's today for a pot of tea and to help out with his new gate he's constructed from a used pallet, all went well and we retired inside the house for a spot of dinner. We got onto the subject of "bleedin' firms who have not paid you enough in wages". Here's my dad's tale, as he told it...
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When I first moved over to fuckin' Morley back in the late 60's, first job I got was in a fuckin' truck yard. Anyhow, first week was good, thought "fuckin' got feet under the table ere you know" decent job. Then the 2 gaffa's came round Friday with the wages like, one of em gives me my packet so I opened it up to give it a count and noticed it was short. So I pulled the gaffa...
"ere fella, my wages are short here"
"yeh I know, we have had to make some cut backs" he said
"well you aint made any fuckin' cut backs in hours av yer, make a noise like the rest of my packet"
"sorry pal, thats your lot we have had to make cut backs"
Then the other gaffa came over and stood next to him, "yeh, that's your wages lad" he said.
"when I got this job, we agreed the wages and your short, so fucking sort it out sharpish!"
"I don't think so, if you don't like it fuck off" the second gaffa said.
"FUCK OFF, FUCK OFF....you cheeky cunt, you have 10 seconds to sort this wage packet out or I get in that 40 tonner and smash it into every fuckin truck you have in this yard" There was about 20 trucks all parked up in this yard you know.
The gaffa's laughed like and the first one said "neey lad, you won't, that's your wage, like a' say if your not happy you know where the door is".
"know where the door is, yeh I know where the fuckin' door is"
So I jumped into the truck, cranked the cunt up and smashed it into the first truck, but it fuckin killed me like you know, injured myself, I thought, I can't smash it into the lot of em, everyone in the yard was running around like fuck. I wound the window down and said..
"This truck is going into the front of your office, sort my money out"
"I'm calling the police" said one of the gaffa's
And off he fuckin trotted like, so I reversed the wagon and follwed the cunt into the office smashing the truck right through the doors and leaving it parked in the office. I jumped out and dived into my motor to get away quickly like, I heard the police sirens going like fuck, and clocked 3 cars after me. I got to my house like, but didn't make it inside before I was arrested.
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So my mum said, "how much did they short change your wage packet by"
"four quid" he said, I burst out laughing so hard, then I said,
"so what happened to you?"
"oh, I got fined four hundred quid"
So i go's "and did you pay it"
"yeh corse I did you fuckin' ad to in them days"